Sunday 23 May 2010

"THEY PAVED PARADISE"

I think most people would agree that one of the things for which our lovely country is renowned is it's beautiful countryside. It's what Blake called "England's green and pleasant land". There is a pretty, green area with some mature trees and shrubs to the side of the main road a few minutes walk from my house. However, this particular verdant spot has the misfortune to be next to a major road junction. It has therefore been a target for advertisers and in it's centre, nestling under the green leaves, is a massive mobile advertising hoarding.

During the recent election campaign, rural fields sprouted with green corn shoots, yellow rapeseed or fruit trees which were augmented by campaign posters advertising the local candidates.

Back in the town, railings, lamposts and traffic lights are adorned with fly posters which are dwarfed by the billboard posters which are almost the size of the houses alongside them.

While I was writing this rant piece, a pile of fliers came through my letterbox which all inform me of a choice of restaurants and take-aways in my area. Then I received a text on my phone which turned out to be from one of my credit card companies advising me of their current rates of interest. There were also a flurry of junk emails which mercifully go straight into the junk folder.

I am having to use all my self control to stop from turning into an urban guerrilla. The mobile hoarding up the road will be my first target if I decide to try my hand at being an arsonist. I am thinking of carrying a pair of wire cutters when I go for a walk to snip the nylon ties which secure the fly posters. I have a sneaky desire to post each of the fliers which came through my door back to the food outlet concerned since they have kindly supplied their addresses but I'm afraid that I will forget to stamp them so they will have to pay the postage.

My first act of rebellion however, was to check that I have no balance on the credit card whose suppliers just texted me then to cut it into small pieces. Let me tell you, that felt so good!

Oh and just in case you can't remember the quote in the title, it's from the lyrics of 'Big Yellow Taxi' by Joni Mitchell - a very appropriate song!

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