I often tend to write about issues which have been on my mind for a while. Unfortunately for you dear reader, my current preoccupation has been with my bowels.
I've been laid low with food poisoning and the associated effects of this and because I am a person who likes to share, I wanted you to hear about 'The Official Diarrhea Song'. (U.S. spelling).
This is an ongoing creation to which you can contribute by submitting your own verse.
I've selected a few examples.
When you're on the seat for hours
and it doesn't smell like flowers:
When your stomach is in pain,
and you're making chocolate rain
When you're riding in a sleigh
And you hear something spray
When you think your friends are joking
but your pants are brown and soaking:
When you think it's chicken soup
but it's really liquid poop.
Oops - sorry have to rush!