NASTY NIFFS

Perhaps predictably, having disclosed my personal ten favourite aromas, I now turn my attention to their opposites - those smells which make you heave with disgust.

Whilst your favourite smells are to a large extent a matter of personal taste, I suspect that there will be more general agreement where disgusting whiffs are concerned.

So in no particular order we have excrement or dung. That smell which suddenly fills your car causing you to look suspiciously at your passenger as you pass a field where muck-spreading has taken place. 

Continuing with the animal world we have wet dog, bad fish and skunk. I haven't personally experienced the latter but my American friends assure me it is to be avoided at all cost. 

The smell of vomit can cause you to produce more of the same of course. Not quite so bad but still awful is someone else's bad breath. Your own is never a problem somehow. Similarly, other peoples farts are always worse than your own. Though in our house the dog always gets the blame - even though we don't have one.

Have you ever smelled a bad egg? Quite revolting. As is the pong from rotten vegetables.

Last but not least there is B.O. which of course stands for body odour. Speaking of which, I must away to shower before I find myself figuring in the list.

JUST BEING NOSEY

You'll be familiar with the idea of 'desert island discs'. I refer to those top ten songs which you would have to take with you were you about to be marooned on an island for an indefinite period.

Well I have been pondering on desert island smells. Those aromas which would be essential to life as a castaway.

This is obviously a very personal choice and no doubt your own list would differ from mine but wafting around in my selection we find the smell of a baby - almost any age will do. Another would be your favourite perfume whatever that might be. A very personal choice of mine which I doubt many would agree with is the smell of a car exhaust. I have loved that smell since I was a child. Newly mown grass figures in my list as does the smell after a fall of rain.

The rest of my list, no surprise to those who know me are 'foodie' smells. Newly baked bread is a must for me - which reminds me that I must bake a loaf today. Coffee beans or ground coffee would have to be there. Frying bacon is in the mix together with the smell of a roast dinner cooking. Rounding off the list would be the smell as you pass a fish and chip shop which is almost impossible to resist.

So there we have it. My ten favourite smells. As to what order I would put them in - who nose?