Wednesday 25 August 2010

BUDGET HOLIDAYS

So here are we Brits trying to scrimp and save and what happens? Holiday firms start going bust so we can't even have a break from it all. "Sorry kids - no holiday this year" - sound of screaming and crying (and that's just from Mum). So what's to be done? Don't despair because yet again, I have the answer.

You will love this because you get a holiday and it costs almost nothing - would I lie to you?

OK my brainwave is.....you holiday at home. No, no, bear with me. You wont miss a thing. Here are the 10 steps towards getting the perfect holiday experience at home. Let's pretend we're off to Italy (but you can tweak it to fit any country).

1. Buy a few large bags of sand and create a mini 'beach' in the garden. Don't use all the sand up though, you'll need some later.
2. Get some big posters of Italian beach scenes from your local holiday shop and stick them up in your windows.
3. Put out a few loungers and then drape towels over them because they've been reserved by some Germans.
4. Buy a few cases of the cheapest Italian wine you can find and work your way through them.
5. Buy lots of pasta and eat some every day.
6. Pick a rainy day and huddle together under a beach umbrella on your mini beach.
7. Sprinkle some sand into your underwear drawer and round the bathroom.
8. Put a sign on the TV screen saying "Italian programs only - sorry".
9. Sit in the car on your drive for a couple of hours and pretend you're in the queue for the airport.
10. Rejoice because you remember you didn't actually go away this year.

1 comment:

  1. Tony, I just put up a tent in the backyard. Go inside the tent (no windows) play beach music and it's just like being at the beach. What do you think??? If you would send me some of your sand I could drop a little on the floor of the tent.

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