I recently heard of what must rank as one of the most unfortunate allergies which a man can possess. The poor gentleman concerned is Robert Pattinson, a British film star most famous for his roles in 'Twilight' and 'Harry Potter'.
Mr. Pattinson is blessed with outrageously good looks and must presumably have a massive female fan base. If my wife's interest in Colin Firth is anything to go by, most of these ladies would like to know him on an intimate basis. Should any of them succeed in this endeavour however, there is a strong caveat which they should be aware of in the form of Mr. Pattinson's curious allergy.
What is this complaint? I quote the poor man himself "I really hate vaginas. I'm allergic to vagina." Do I hear you scoff at this news? You believe he just said it for effect and to grab the headlines? How very cynical you are dear reader!
Let me now tell you a not unrelated joke which I heard today.
A man is seeking a job so he goes to a Gloucester employment agency.
"Good afternoon Mr. Smith. We have a local vacancy which requires no previous experience or training. It is for a Gynaecologist's assistant. The pay is £700 per month with 10 weeks paid holiday per year."
Mr. Smith cannot hide his keen interest and asks what the job entails.
"Well, as the assistant, your task is to liberally apply cream to the ladies to relax them and thus prepare them for their examination by the Doctor. The only problem is that it's in Edinburgh".
"But I thought you said the job was local!" said Mr. Smith.
"Oh it is - but the back of the queue for applicants is in Edinburgh".
Obviously, Mr. Pattinson will not be applying.