Wednesday 11 September 2013

THE FULL ENGLISH (27)


Let's be honest. Not all 'wise' old sayings are true. They don't necessarily have any wisdom within.

For instance - "You can't have your cake and eat it". How stupid is that? If I've just bought myself a tasty chocolate eclair what am I going to do with it other than eat it? I can promise you no-one else is going to eat it but me. The saying is trying to say 'you can't have it both ways' but this is a pretty daft way of phrasing it.

Then there's "Children should be seen and not heard". How Victorian is that? With most kids today the only way you're going to achieve this is by taping up their mouths.

Then you have the ones which disagree with each other like "Look before you leap" and "He who hesitates is lost". To dither or not to dither - that is the question.

Finally we have "An apple a day keeps the doctor away". Rubbish. I tried leaving an apple at the doctor's surgery every day for a month. He was round at my place complaining as soon as he discovered it was me who kept cluttering up his surgery with them.

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