Sunday, 7 April 2013


Forgive me reader for I have sinned. I must confess that there were times when I was still working when I 'pulled a sickie'. 

Occasionally I would wake in the morning and feel so tired that I phoned in and put on my best croaky voice to inform them of my laryngitis, flu, throat cancer, near-death experience or whatever came to mind that I thought they might believe. It felt good - it felt wicked.

Then of course the next day when I went into work, I made sure I had a dry throat or was limping or maybe using a walking stick to back up my subterfuge. 

I thought I was quite good at this until I recently discovered that there was a ruse I hadn't thought of. A Social Worker has been found guilty of fraud after taking a total of 66 days off work. You might think that this was a long time time to be ill, and it is. Her reasons for absence were because of the apparent deaths of both her parents, an uncle, an aunt, her brother and her ex-husband.

First her father was killed in a car crash. Next her mother was sectioned and then died during surgery. Presumably because of the grief of losing his parents her brother then died. Next her ex-husband killed himself and she had to identify his body. Finally an uncle and aunt died within a week of each other.

My guess is that her bosses investigated her because they couldn't afford any more 'sorry for your loss' cards and were sick of being R.I.P. ped off.

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